Friday, September 9, 2011
My girls adore each other. They play together for hours and hours and leave a mess stretching from here to California to prove just how much fun they have had.
But sometimes, sometimes, they are absolutely horrid to each other. Teresa will make some snarky nasty comment about Katie's singing, drawing, dancing for no reason whatsoever. Katie will make irritating noises she knows bugs the hell out of Teresa until Teresa loses it and shoves her. They go back and forth in endless meaningless arguments until I am screaming for them to shut up. (I don't say shut up, it's not allowed, but while I may use more acceptable wording, believe you me, my tone is saying SHUT THE FUCK UP!) While this is happening I think to myself, "why? why do they do this?" "Will they always be so horrible to each other and miss out on having that sister bond?" "Will they end up scarring each other forever with the things they are saying/doing to each other?"
Once I finally take some deep breaths, I realize something. My sisters were the ones who tormented me by calling me "Dia-ree-ah" when I was small. I can't count the number of times I pulled my younger sister's hair or pinched her (sorry Carol). We made up less than flattering nicknames for each other (Carol and I) based on the shape of our heads. I got into verbal fights with my sisters that scared our friends with the nastiness. We excluded each other from clubs and games.
And yet, we still love each other beyond reason. Probably because, they are also the ones who made up gymnastics or dance routines for me so we could put on a show. They are the ones I stayed up late studying and laughing with. They are the ones who lent me their clothes. They are the ones who played animals with me until they wanted to die of boredom. They are the ones I visited at college and included me in all the cool college goings on. They are the ones I invited up to visit me when I was in college and I could share my cool college goings on.
When we get to reminiscing, we don't gloss over the times that are less than pretty. We drag those memories out and laugh over them. It is the sum of the good, the bad, and the ugly that make our bonds so strong. We learned how to get along in an imperfect world while we were learning how to get along with each other.
So, my girls may not have this sweet rainbow and unicorns existence with each other every single moment. But I'm guessing that there may be hope for them after all.