Friday, March 29, 2013

missing in action

Where to begin?  How to start?  Do I pick up and pretend I never stopped or do I go in for a long winded explanation about life and busy and busy and life? eh, you know.  I missed a week and then another and before you knew it nearly six months had gone by. 

Can I just start by saying how very very tired I am?  Cripes! It seems like I go to bed immediately after dinner and still need to drag my ass out of bed when the alarm goes off in the morning.  I blame the kids, and the dogs, and the cat. Oh my God! The damn cat.  She is seriously the bane of my existence.  She knows, I swear she knows, when my alarm is set to go off and she deliberately wakes me about 30 minutes prior to.  Just be a pain in my ass. 

The dogs hold a close second to being the bane of my existence.  In order to leave the house nowadays, I have to barricade my kitchen cabinets and any other potential source of food.  I stash food stuffs into the microwave and oven to prevent them from being swallowed whole by the dogs while we're gone.  They are like the geniuses of the canine world because they have figured out how to open my cabinets, which are childproofed mind, to get at the food stuff.  So I must place chairs which are weighted down with things in front of the cabinets.  I was hiding the Easter candy in the hall closet but they ferreted that one out and I came home to just the empty bags.  They ate all the jelly beans, all the chocolate eggs (foil and all), and all the marshmallow peeps.  The new Easter candy is back in the hall closet but I have two baby gates, one of top of the other, in the door of the closet to keep it safe. They have also learned how to open the diaper pail.  You must step on the pedal in order to make the top pop open.  Not a problem at all for my mensa pups.  So even that is now childproofed.  Because, um...yuck.   It would be a lot easier to just crate them when we leave but we like to keep them out to discourage robbers.  I'm paranoid like that. 

My boy lost his very last baby tooth the other day.  His very last baby tooth.  Is it weird I wanted to save it?  I tossed all his other teeth without a thought but this one I held on to for just a bit before finally rolling it off of my hand into the trash.  How is it possible he can be done with baby teeth?  Why does childhood have to rush by in such a blur?  He's becoming such a funny young man.  At night he likes to come in while I'm reading in bed and talk.  Our discussions range from him reciting plays of football games played over thirty years ago to his fears about death to how much he loves his math teacher to who will be nominated to political positions and what that might mean for us to minecraft and why creepers shouldn't be allowed to destroy anything while you're sleeping.  Little boy and young man co-existing happily.  We've yet to see much teenager in him yet and for that I am thankful.

Because his ten year old sister is more than making up for the lack of teenage attitude in him.  Oh my Lordy, does that girl have attitude and then some.  It's a darn good thing she's cute, otherwise I would have sold her to the gypsies.  Which reminds me...have you ever seen the show about the American gypsies?  My daughter has, and she absolutely lusts after their blinged out clothes, shoes, and accessories.  Yeah, I had better start self medicating myself now in preparation for her teen years.

So, in short, I'm here, still navigating through each day and taking on it's challenges with humor, chocolate, and a little bit of wine.  Because everything is better with chocolate (just ask my dogs) and wine.